Everyone handles grief differently. Lord knows there is plenty of it to go around. Thousands on both sides—Israelis and Gaza Palestinians—are suffering a complicated grief as the ravages of the fog war once again sweeps over the Middle East.
More than 1,300 children and teens have been killed by gunfire in the US this year. Deshon DuBose was one, struck outside an Atlanta skating rink by two bullets never meant for him.
Hurricane Otis killed 27 in Acapulco, Mexico. And this week eighteen families are grieving after a deranged gunman opened fire on a crowded bowling rink and a restaurant/bar in Lewiston, Maine. One cannot ignore the response of Leroy Walker, Sr., who lost his beloved son Joey in this mass shootings.
“You have to put that (grief) out of your mind. I have to let the Lord do whatever has to be done. If this person, at the time, was in his right mind, I believe he would have been a loving person just as we are. I just can’t hate him. I believe in the Lord and in the end, He will prevail here. I guess we can’t make our choices on people. I just can’t hate this person. I have been taught differently. You can’t run around hating people. If you do, these things will happen more and more. If you hate and it drives you crazy, you’re going to hurt people. I’ve had ups and downs in my life. I don’t want anyone to hurt me and I don’t want to hurt anyone. I’m sure, this man—whatever happened to his mind—he wasn’t born to be a killer. Hate will never bring my son back.”
Leroy Walker’s response is not usual, but is not unprecedented. David lost his adversary-king, King Saul, and his beloved friend, Jonathan, the son of Saul due to war, yet he refused to let hate rule the day. Perhaps it was because of the covenant God made with him:
13He shall build a house for my name, and I will establish the throne of his kingdom forever. 14I will be his father, and he shall be my son: if he commits iniquity, I will chasten him with the rod of men, and with the stripes of the children of men; 15but my lovingkindness shall not depart from him, as I took it from Saul, whom I put away before thee. 2 Sam. 7:13-15
The key to David’s aversion to the option of hate was the house God promised him—a house that will never be absent of His love no matter what David did to sin against God. And David did plenty—adultery, murder, deceit.
Everyone handles grief and loss differently. In the fog of the current attacks in the Middle East, the region is torn, the response to grief is not simple: self-defense vs. self-determination. For one Atlanta family mourning the loss of their bright, brief morning star, solace is found in a long graveside visitation. For a grieving father over a loss son of Maine, love is the best answer to a reassured reunion.
8Love never fails; but if [there are gifts of] prophecy, they will be done away; if [there are] tongues, they will cease; if [there is] knowledge, it will be done away. 13But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love. 1 Cor.13:8,14
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